Hell, meet high water.
Here's a third idea: Confide your dilemma — only that you have personal knowledge about this person, unrelated to work, that makes it extremely difficult for you to work effectively with him — to one trustworthy ally who will be at the meeting. Maybe your ally can run interference as you network, pulling you away or stepping in to chat if the guy tries to approach you.
I urge you to hash out your options — and the other issues this situation will trigger — with a therapist specializing in sexual trauma. You need a safe place to plot your course and stock your arsenal, so you can be the champion of your own health and career.
Thanks to Sharon Snyder, of the Ober Kaler national law firm.
Karla L. Miller writes an advice column on navigating the modern workplace. Each week she will answer one or two questions from readers. Miller has written for and edited tax publications for 16 years, most recently for the accounting firm KPMG's Washington National Tax office. You can find her on Twitter, @KarlaAtWork.